


buchgebunden.

by Quecksilver_Eyes



Series: We're not meant to be alone [15]
Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Character Study, M/M, and then another, booker in the aftermath, but this is a, everyone else is a minor character in here, on breathing, on coming to terms with living, on taking one step
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:35:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27567592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quecksilver_Eyes/pseuds/Quecksilver_Eyes
Summary: in another story, there will always be Quynh. | Quynh, with her hands soft | and her voice softer | Quynh, with the world | at the tip of her tongue | Quynh, dry and breathing | tethered to this earth.
Relationships: Andy | Andromache & Booker | Sebastien & Nile Freeman & Joe | Yusuf & Nicky | Nicolò & Quynh, Booker | Sebastien le Livre & Lykon, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: We're not meant to be alone [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1906879
Comments: 4
Kudos: 28





	buchgebunden.

I think I want –

my son’s hands in mine  
my wife’s life scraped onto metal  
this blood to stay wet and red  
and just blood.

I think I want –

in the beginning, there was Andy.

Andy is older than the written word  
her memories  
this canopy  
this earth.

in another story, there will always be Quynh.

Quynh, with her hands soft  
and her voice softer  
Quynh, with the world  
at the tip of her tongue  
Quynh, dry and breathing  
tethered to this earth.

in another story, there will always be Lykon.  
; a smile and  
; dark eyes and  
; laughter, deep in my guts.

somewhere, halfway through, there were Joe and Nicky  
blood stained and needle teethed  
and desperate; doomed.  
so soft around their razor sharp edges  
that my skin breaks  
on impact.

in the end, there is Nile  
morning-dew eyes and unshaking hands  
her world in our laps, ours in between her teeth  
she stabs Andy.

I think I want –

the wounds keep healing  
closing  
dying  
beat.  
breath.  
now live, again.

_you don’t change and you cannot stay and the pain is the same as it was settled deep in your frozen bones, hanging by a thread or maybe just a rope with nothing but phantom-water in your lungs. you don’t change and you cannot stay and Jean-Pierre –_

_can you forgive yourself?_

here’s a calculation no one should ever make:

how much is friendship worth? how much an end? what will you pay for peace? what would you give to stop your blood from creeping back into this body – long since dust?

in the beginning, there was Andy.

I shoot her in the back.

somewhere, halfway through, there were Joe and Nicky.

I send them bound, and needled and frothing at my mouth into their doom

in the end, there is Nile.

I would have let her walk into the shark’s teeth, her head held high.

I think I want –

Quynh, with her voice soft  
Quynh, with her sea-water lungs  
Quynh, with my language on her tongue  
Quynh, locked in a box  
Quynh, scraping at metal in between –  
beat.  
breath.  
now, live again.

I think I want –

beat.  
breath.  
now live, again.

I think I want to buy baklava, a hundred years from now.


End file.
